Six months ago I welcomed a bewitching baby girl into my world. She arrived with a beautiful, perfect little body—tiny hands and feet, chubby legs and arms, a cute little round belly, bright blue eyes, red rosebud lips, and a delicious thick neck and double chin. I have spent hours peering into that tiny face and imagining this little person’s future.
I have also spent hours learning to decipher and tend to her needs. Right now those needs are relatively simple: eat, sleep, poop, rinse, and repeat. But I often wonder how her needs will evolve as her body, soul, and mind grow. I think about how I will meet those changing needs in the future.
I worry in particular about how she will view herself, both inside and out—in pop culture terms, how her self-image will develop. As a woman who has grown up in a world and profession that focuses intensely on outward appearance as a measure of self worth, I sometimes fear the outside influences that I know await her.
She will be bombarded with images of a perfect body, flawless skin, and lustrous hair—most of which are Photoshopped to unattainable and unrealistic levels of perfection. She will be inundated with products, diet plans, self-help books, and quick fixes that for $19.99 in three easy installments will deliver that perfection (guaranteed!). Movies, magazines, televisions, billboards—the images are endless.
When I was a freshman in college, my voice teacher offered me some sage advice before my first opera audition. She told me that if I did 80 to 85 percent of the things I set out to do in the audition, I should consider it a huge success. A live performance, and especially an audition, she said, would rarely if ever be 100 percent perfect. And yet, we listen to recordings, professionally mastered to digitally remove every flaw and then compare our live performances to that. It was unfair and unrealistic, she said.
We make the same comparisons between our own bodies and the glossed-up, glammed-up, digitally mastered images we see day in and day out. As opera enters high-definition movie theaters and image becomes ever more important, the pressure to not only sound but also look like that is intense. So I repeat what my voice teacher said: that level of perfection is unfair and unrealistic.
And yet, as you will read from three singers in this issue, image is important for opera singers and looking good—fair or not—is part of the business. Lisette Oropesa, Othalie Graham, and Olivia Ward all determined to look the part to increase their chances for success as singers. As they put it, it was simply a business decision.
The common thread and truly inspiring aspect of these three singers’ stories is that they put their health first, before weight loss or appearance. Each one’s remarkable results came after hard work, literal sweat, and more than a few tears. There was no magic pill or quick fix, just conscientious eating and regular exercise over a long period of time. It required determination and dedication.
That’s the message I hope to convey to my own daughter—that her body is a gift, to be loved, cherished, and cared for. Her own good health is more important and valuable than looking like any magazine model. I want to help her see herself as she truly is, not as she is compared to someone or something else.
And in the meantime, I am striving to learn and live the lesson myself. Although just a few days ago I ran my first half-marathon since giving birth, I can’t stop thinking about those 15 pounds of baby weight I still need to lose. So while I delight in her chubby legs and double chin, perhaps I can learn to delight in my own. Health first, right?
