I enjoy singing for funerals. This is, perhaps, a statement not made by many classical singers. While many people might find this statement peculiar, I assure you it is well warranted.
My musical career began as a teenager when I was selected to be the lead vocal soloist at my community church. In addition to my singing performances, I played the piano for weekly services and special church events. Each performance provided me with the opportunity for growth. I learned to not only hone my vocal and piano skills, but just as importantly, I learned the intrinsic value that music has on the community.
It was not long after my regular appearance at Sunday services I received an offer to perform as a soloist for a funeral mass. I welcomed the opportunity to explore a new area of performance, but I harbored a secret fear of the responsibility involved in playing an integral part in an intimate family moment. When the day for the funeral mass arrived, however, I found myself singing for the life that was. I found myself singing for the people who needed comfort. I found myself singing for the mystery of life and death. At that moment, I learned that to give the gift of music at such an emotional time is a privilege.
When I left the church, I passed by some family members, and they were very thankful for the music. One person after another thanked me, telling me how much they appreciated the music. I was once again reminded that our gift as singers is for the world.
Music has profound power. It can awaken the senses. It can move people to tears or laughter. Music can even allow us to defy the realities of time by helping us to recapture long-forgotten memories. The role of ceremonial music is very significant. It can define an event. The role of music at a funeral is particularly important. People are often at their most vulnerable when someone close to them passes away. Good performing musicians allow themselves to use their talent and musical intuition to assuage grief. They create a space in time that establishes dignity, compassion, and beauty. An audience might never be as vulnerable to the power of music as at such a time.
Talented musicians should be performing everywhere. Rejoice in the gift that was given you, and share it with those around you. Here are some suggestions for singers who might wish to perform this special work.
Contact churches or funeral homes and let them know of your availability. Be prepared. I recommend bringing a business card and demo. Some will be satisfied with your business cards; others might ask for a musical sample. If you provide a musical sample, show familiarity with the type of music often performed. You might have a profound “Quando m’en vo” but it may not be as helpful as a “Panis Angelicus.”
The website Christian Music Funeral List at http://dnwallace.com/blog/christian-funeral-music-list offers additional suggestions for music at funerals. Some of the most useful Christian publications are: GIA, Oregon Catholic Press, World Music, American Catholic Press, Liturgical Press, Word Music, and Morning Star. I suggest you buy a basic hymnal. You can buy copies of sheet music on www.ocp.org/en/.
Many funerals take place in either a church or funeral home. The music performed in the church is generally traditional, but some churches allow some non-traditional music. “Non-traditional” music implies secular music.
The possibilities for non-traditional songs are as vast as the number of songs that have been written. Sometimes the family, the funeral director, or church organist chooses the music.
If you have not received a music list from the church and you are unfamiliar with the practices of that church, phone the church and inquire if the music you’ve selected is appropriate for that particular church. Churches have varying rules for appropriate music. At one Catholic church I might be able to sing “Danny Boy” (a secular song) but at another Catholic church just one mile away, I might not be allowed to sing it.
When you sing in a church setting you must be certain the music is appropriate for that particular church. In addition, be aware that this is often a delicate matter for the family. It is good to have a family representative speak with the pastor regarding any conflicts. Remember, you may want to return to a particular church in the future, so it is advantageous to create a positive relationship with the religious leader.
Generally, funeral homes have more freedom of musical choice than churches. Suggest to the families that they use this venue for songs that may have not been appropriate for use at church. Music at funeral homes may be traditional, non-traditional, or a combination of the two—singing “Somewhere over the Rainbow” and “How Great Thou Art” in the same service for a funeral home would not be unusual. This freedom of choice allows the family to be more expressive. Being versatile is very important when you sing for funerals.
One of the most important imprints we as singers can leave on the world is the gift of music through song. As artists, we have the power to create beauty and to stir people’s emotions. Music captures a moment in the subconscious and can satisfy an aching heart.
Everyone has or will experience the loss of someone they love. As musicians, we can help to create a beautiful moment, to heal, and to celebrate life.
