You have a talented son or daughter in your household who loves to sing? Wonderful! Perhaps they are involved in their school’s choir or musical theatre. You realize their interest has grown into a serious commitment as the music becomes increasingly more challenging in high school. Searching for a private voice teacher, finding performing opportunities, researching college programs, and playing chauffeur and cheerleader begin to consume everyday activity. Multiply that times three, and you have my life.
As a parent of three classically trained singers, I have a bit of advice.
Perhaps you might say my children’s involvement in music was inevitable. We live in Langhorne, Pennsylvania, and our public elementary school music teacher was also the director of the wonderful Pennsylvania Youth Chorale (PYC). Through PYC, my children were fortunate to be involved in performing and touring at an early age, and this early exposure to classical music shaped their future endeavors. We were also fortunate to have a wonderful music program in the Neshaminy School District which gave them opportunities to perform in county and regional competitions.
When it came time to seek out private vocal instruction, we chose private voice lessons through Settlement Music School, a community music school in Philadelphia. The school offered voice, theory, dance, composition, and instrumental lessons, and also provided important opportunities to perform as soloists before an audience on a regular basis. My children were also involved in an apprentice program with two local opera companies in their sophomore and junior years of high school.
Competitions were also an essential tool in preparing our children for college auditions. All three were involved in the adjudications sponsored by the local chapter of the National Association of Teachers of Singing and the Classical Singer High School Competition. We learned that the best time to do the CS High School Competition was in their junior year—that was the perfect time to attend the college expo, participate in masterclasses, and become more familiar with the audition process. In addition, they received individual comments from the competition judges, getting valuable feedback about their performance.
In considering their choice of majors, I discussed career options with each of my children reminding them that they must consider the job market after college. Their private teacher, Susan Rheingans, gave them a college chart to help them organize required information, meet important deadlines, and make an informed choice. The chart included college requirements, audition requirements, tuition, college application fees, and type of vocal education (conservatory versus university curriculum).
Travel and hotel expenses were a separate but important consideration in the audition process. Living on the East Coast, we are relatively close to many wonderful schools. To save time and money, we decided to combine the college tour and the entrance audition. During the winter months, we traveled by car to Boston, New Jersey, New York, and Philadelphia for auditions. During one particular snowy weekend in Boston (auditions were not canceled), we took a cab to and from the audition.
It was very important to manage a reasonable schedule so that auditions did not overlap on the same day. Sometimes we could manage two auditions in the same weekend. Sometimes we traveled as a family to the auditions, and other times just my husband or I accompanied our child while the others stayed at home.
Parents should consider other hidden expenses. If your child decides on an out-of-town institution, factor in the cost of trips home. My daughter, for example, wanted to stay in Philadelphia while my son chose Boston. Parents should also be prepared to invest wisely in audition attire for your son or daughter. Shopping for the audition dress can be fun and exhausting at the same time. Black is a safe bet, but you may want to consider a color that compliments your daughter’s eyes or hair color, setting her apart from the competition. A well fitting suit and tie is perfect for your son’s audition.
On the advice of my son’s voice teacher, once he was accepted into New England Conservatory, he auditioned with the voice faculty to find the best fit for him. This gave him an opportunity before he started college to get to know his teacher, ask questions about teaching methods for his voice type (tenor), and learn the teaching schedules throughout the school year. With this information, my son was able to request his teacher instead of relying on the school to assign one to him. My daughter (a soprano) chose the voice teacher at Temple University recommended by her private voice teacher, and she was ultimately happy with her decision.
Allowing your children to find their true voice is so important. In the process, they may ultimately decide that voice is really not what they want for a college major. One of my sons was accepted into college as a voice major and then decided that he really wanted to be an instrumental music major. I realized that he was much happier after he made this decision. As parents we always want what is best for our children, but sometimes we get so wrapped up in their goals that they become our own. Remembering whose future it really is, and then letting go when they choose differently than we might, can be a difficult process. But your children will benefit in the end.
Let your children find their true voice, their passion for whatever it is they want to do, making sure your love and support are never far away.
