The great 21st-century philosopher (and, yes, pop singer) Nellie McKay once said, “Hold up! Let me steal a breath, ’cause we’re dealing with identity theft.” Beyond that, there are many ways in which something you own can be pilfered, pinched, or purloined—and just as many ways in which it can cost you big. I’ve been there (cell phone, iPod, credit card numbers, purse, wallet), and I’m willing to lay down some of the money which I’ve put into replacing the lost goods on the odds that many of you have, in one way or another, been there as well.
You may not be able to prevent it, either. Not every mugger will be like the thief that attempted to hold up Bronx social worker Julio Diaz with a knife and, after being treated to dinner by Diaz, returned his wallet (and turned over his weapon). Other instances of theft, thanks especially to the digital age, are less dangerous but just as unavoidable. Read on for more on how to survive several types of heists with your sanity and budget largely intact—and how to help prevent them in the first place.
Hold the Phone
Writer Clay Shirky begins his first book, Here Comes Everybody (a meditation on the convergence of Internet and society) with the anecdote of a young New York woman who loses her Sidekick in the backseat of a cab in 2006. Failing an e-mail sent to the phone asking whoever had picked it up for its return and offering a reward, the woman eventually retrieved her stolen Sidekick after a viral campaign that exposed the girl who had picked up the phone—and refused to return it—drove the NYPD to investigate the situation, arrest the girl, and return the phone to its rightful owner. However, the owner would not have been able to get the original Sidekick returned had she not invested an additional $300 into getting a replacement at the onset of her original phone disappearing—it was the data transfer from the old to new phone that revealed photographs taken by the girl who had picked it up.
Ultimately, the case of the stolen Sidekick was more a matter of principles and social networking than the retrieval of a missing product. However, there are ways to minimize the financial damage that losing your mobile device can wreak (retrieving all of your data may be another story).
If your phone is lost or stolen, your first call should be to your service provider to have your account suspended. Even if, like Shirky’s heroine, you initially lose your phone (side note: always do a quick scan of a cab when you exit), someone could easily pick it up and take the opportunity to send out a deluge of text messages or make long-distance calls to Kuala Lumpur. Get this resolved first as, unlike your credit card, once charges are made to your phone, you won’t be able to easily reverse them.
Secondly, if your phone was stolen, file a police report at the precinct closest to where you believe it was nicked. Lost property is a different story, but getting a police report on a stolen cell phone—and getting a copy of it for your records—will come in handy in replacing it. Most mobile service providers have insurance plans either built into your contract or available for a nominal fee. As a Steve Jobs loyalist, I highly recommend Apple’s variety of protection plans for all devices; they cost a bit up front, but I rest much easier knowing that should my iPhone disappear either into someone else’s pocket or my toilet, it will be immediately replaced without question.
Lap(top) It Up
Your computer dying on you is one thing (for anyone who follows my writings regularly, you may remember the fiscal hit I took last year when my laptop suddenly and without warning died). And that in and of itself can be a traumatic experience. But if your laptop suddenly disappears from your hotel room, kitchen, backpack, or train compartment and has seemingly sprouted legs and walked off, the inner torment can be even worse.
Like a shanghaied cell phone, along with many other items that go missing, one of your first stops should be the police station. File a police report and get a copy for your records to help with the ensuing reports and identity-protection measures you’ll have to take. If you have insurance, this will also help you with a claim for coverage.
And just as a friendly reminder: get insurance on your valuables.
Unlike a mobile phone, however, laptops leave less of a digital paper trail. There are several encryption and theft-tracking software programs, however, that you can invest in beforehand that, like insurance, will come in handy should you turn around in Starbucks and realize upon turning back that your MacBook is not where it was a second ago. Hidden (hiddenapp.com) is many folks’ protection of choice when it comes to Apple computers.
A basic plan for $15 a year protects one computer and helps you track down who is using your machine once it’s stolen (if you have up to 5 Macs, you can insure them all for $45 a year). All you have to do upon losing your machine is activate the tracking and Hidden will locate your computer, collecting photographs of the thief and screen shots of the computer in use—as well as what they call “lots of nerdy network information.” Hidden also works with the police, which will make your life much easier.
GadgetTrak (gadgettrak.com) is a service that works on both Mac and PCs, getting the location of the computer from WiFi networks. Also worth investing in is an encryption program such as TrueCrypt
(truecrypt.com) which will protect your data, including passwords and financial information, should they fall into the wrong hands. While you’re at it, get an external hard drive and perform regular backups and make sure you keep copies of your laptop’s serial number in a secure place (that’s not on your computer). As you would do in a case of identity theft, you’ll also want to change all of your passwords for every single website you use and cancel any credit cards you’ve used online.
On the Road
Whether your vehicle disappears overnight from your driveway or parking garage or it disappears when you go to a voice lesson or Starbucks, car theft is one of the biggest headaches to deal with. Fortunately, since insurance is mandatory for car owners, you already have a leg up on the situation. File a police report and keep that on hand when you file your claim with your insurers.
Take a deep breath and have the following information handy when you file your insurance claim: the date, time, and location where you last saw your car; its year, make, and model; its Vehicle Identification Number; its Certificate of Title; the location of all keys to the vehicle; and the names and contact information of anyone who has access to the vehicle (spouse, cousin, nanny).
Knowing as well the contact information for your financing or leasing company, if applicable, will help your insurance agency out, and they can even help—depending on what state you live in—recoup the costs of anything that was stolen along with your vehicle. Sometimes, homeowners or renters insurance also can cover these items. That’ll come in handy if your car is stolen with your cell phone and laptop in the backseat. Here’s another silver lining: a shrewd accountant may also be able to help you negotiate a tax deduction for a casualty loss, especially if the car is never retrieved.
The National Insurance Crime Bureau suggests several actions to take in protecting your car against auto theft. Obviously, locking your car and not leaving any valuables or car titles in the automobile is your first step. And while car alarms seem in the 21st century like a moot point (how many times do we ignore those familiar wails at night?), incorporating items like kill switches, fuel cutoffs, and smart keys can keep a thief from operating your car. Add to that a GPS or similar tracking device and that’ll make it easier for police to focus in on your Focus.
A friend of mine also takes a strange delight in leaving classical cassette tapes on the front passenger’s seat of her car, claiming that the classical music suggests “uninteresting” while the cassette tapes suggest “poor.” Do with that information what you will, but it is a creative use for all of those now-useless Memorexes sitting in your closet.
Pocket Linings
According to my local police precinct, the most common theft—indeed, the most common crime—they encounter is pickpocketing. No matter how you slice that terminology, from the actual wallet in your pocket to an entire purse seemingly large enough to hold the Hindenburg, your common petty thievery (or even, if you’re less fortunate, an all-out mugging) boils down to the same stolen goods: credit cards, bank cards, IDs, cash, metro cards, and that Dunkin’ Donuts card that still has $0.23 left on it.
First off, don’t call the police just yet. Contact all of your credit card and bank companies to place a hold on your accounts. Do it as soon as you realize your wallet has been filched, as many criminals will try immediately to make a small-scale purchase on your card to test the limits (and to make sure you haven’t already called Visa or AmEx). Be sure to confirm all recent activity with your banks and credit card companies and keep these numbers on hand in advance. The quicker you freeze your accounts, the fewer unauthorized charges you’ll have to contend with.
Next, immediately file a police report. The police and your bank will be able to work in tandem to apprehend the thieves: even if your account is frozen, their attempted charges will still show up, along with their locations. Following that, call your credit agencies to place a fraud alert on your account. This will keep whoever has your identification cards from opening up any new accounts in your name. You can do this by calling any one of the three main credit agencies—Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion—who will then pass on the information to the other two.
And perhaps the best advice of all might be to just keep certain items off of you. Just because you needed your Social Security card that one time you were applying for an extended travel visa or completing some new-hire paperwork doesn’t mean it should have a permanent place in your wallet. It’s one of the hardest cards to replace and most dangerous to lose in regards to identity theft, and it’s not a necessary item to carry around. Keep it in a safety deposit box at your bank or in a safe in your home along with copies of whatever else is in your wallet. This will help if you ever have to make those frustrating phone calls and don’t know where to start. It’s also a great excuse to clean out your wallet or purse on a regular basis.
