When I am anxious it is because I am living in the future. When I am depressed it is because I am living in the past. – Author Unknown
It’s that time of year when we can feel overwhelmed and agitated because of the many upcoming expectations we put on ourselves. Time seems to speed up and all that needs to be accomplished seems to fly by without our being in control of what or how it happens. It’s sort of like being on a train looking out the window as the scenery quickly passes us by and disappears into the past. It seems like we don’t have enough time to manage the many facets of our lives. There are auditions, performances, lessons, coachings, buying Holiday presents for our friends and family, planning how best to get home for the Holidays, continue to go to work, buying groceries, paying bills, and the list goes on and on. And contrary to popular belief, human beings cannot multitask so don’t even go there. You just can’t effectively attend to two things at once – even the superficially automatic ones. With all that going on – past and future – it’s no wonder that presence is so elusive.
So how can you slow this train down so you can give yourself the present of being present in the present moment? It is not as elusive as you might believe.
The first thing to recognize is that, try as we might, you really can only do one thing at a time, so you ought to do that one thing wholeheartedly and with focus. Most of your time is spent in the past or the future, rather than the present moment. What you end up doing is passing through that moment on the way to somewhere else and, in doing so, you miss the moment. That’s how life ends up passing you by – you do it to yourself.
Have you ever considered how often you find yourself rehearsing – and that’s all you’re doing is rehearsing – your past? You can imagine that this is problematic because it’s something that can’t be changed. It’s done, set in stone, irrefutable and immovable. However, you certainly can change your relationship to the past. You have the choice about how you do what you do. So choose to find the lesson within what you have just done, if it didn’t exactly turn out how you expected, and then let it go. It had its purpose and you are now free to apply that lesson to the present or even the future.
Anticipating the future can also be problematic, even futile, because, no matter how much you’d like to convince yourself otherwise, you can’t really control the direction in which things will go. It’s a good thing to set an intention, and goals true, but, in the end as you well know, the universe has a way of deciding. Being flexible is the key here.
So, staying present, then, means staying here – right here – and there are a few simple steps that can lead you to the experience of profound attention and a direct experience of the moment that you’re in.
Breathe – Start by drawing in a deep breath and letting it out through your nose. Focus on the exhale because nothing is happening. Everything falls away for that simple span of time – a breath. This allows you to release the anxieties of the past and the expectations of the future.
Witness – Become aware of exactly what you are doing right this minute and each minute that comes after this one. Be aware through your senses of feeling, seeing, tasting, smelling and hearing. If you are standing or sitting, feel the feet on the floor, feel the clothing against the skin, taste, smell and then let the listening go out to include everything in your space and beyond without naming anything. And if your mind drifts, bring it back to listening. After this small practice, you will feel refreshed and focused.
The act of being present is in a sense a meditation without meditating. It’s giving yourself permission to let go of all else and simply be. This small cycle can profoundly change your perception of the world and allow you to let your attention rest where the working surfaces meet. In that moment you are very alive and present. What a great present to give yourself – the present.
Practice makes permanent – Enjoy the present. Ciao, Carol
