Never before in human history have we been the recipients of so much information designed to fill us with ideas, desires, and distractions. The news of the world good, bad or indifferent is available at every hour of every day. We can keep out that pesky internal chatter in our own heads at any time by putting on a set of headphones and distracting ourselves with music, spending time talking to someone on the phone, text messaging, Twittering or going to Facebook just so we don’t have to deal with our own thoughts or make time for any kind of quiet contemplation, critical thinking or focusing on business tasks. It is often very difficult to listen to what is going on inside our heads because we often think that whatever it is we are not equipped to handle. We think it should be easy to focus on our own thoughts, forgive ourselves for our mistakes and use the feedback to change what was to what could be, or use our energy to create and maintain real and lasting relationships. We often feel like the lone ranger, like we are the only ones with these doubts, insecurities, frustrations and internal chaos. So we hide behind and become very attached to being distracted. And, we become unconsciously attached to all of the emotions that go with that.
As hard as it is to believe, taking a break from being that plugged into the world and tuned out from your innermost self might be refreshing and certainly help you get a more balanced perspective of your life even though it might require that you make some changes.
In the 16th century sailors used the term “fetish” which comes from the Portuguese word meaning “charm” to describe the odd objects made of many different items that were worshipped by the natives of western Africa. The sailors thought them interesting souvenirs to bring home, but the Africans held them in great esteem believing that they were home to the spirits. We too have our own version of this “fetish.”
It is our emotional attachment to our things, stuff and our every day pluggediness, that often pulls us off point. Have you ever noticed how invested your own soul and spirit is in these things. Many of us allow them to define our worth and we often make their acquisition and constant usage one of the central goals of our lives with all the emotional baggage attached. Shunning the material world which also includes that emotional baggage, is not an automatic “get out of jail free” card. The more we feed our materialistic and emotional appetites, the hungrier they become. They both provide a link with the past, and a message to the future. Think about that! Often both allow us to stay stuck in our comfort zone afraid to break out and take that all important risk whether it be in conducting the business aspects that will get you to the next step in your career or personal relationships that need tending . Both are tricky because we tend to feel that they are valid in and of themselves. And emotions help stir our passion for what we are doing, right? But succumbing to the emotional longing to possess something or someone can and often does create distractions and defenses which can often make us feel “caged.”
The challenge to all of this is to remind ourselves that our own worth is innate and inviolable. The worth of any object or relationship and it’s emotional pull – whether it be becoming a “star”, a piece of art, a car, an heirloom, a person, food or drink, lies in what it is, not in whether we can aspire to possess it or fear its loss.
From my own experience I feel it all boils down to knowing how to slow down just a wee bit and having the guts to get more unplugged. It might feel very unnerving and uncomfortable in the beginning. However this allows you to start looking at your world through different eyes so you can do the necessary critical thinking about a particular subject or business prospect which will eventually give you a real choice as to what you want to accomplish or do. You need to be awake in the sense that you are not always only in your thinking mind, which is a great tool, but also a great emotional distracter.
See if this sounds familiar: You start out with some great thought that then brings you to something else, and that leads to what you to, “I forgot to pick up the laundry” to “I need to call …….”, etc. and you are off and running finding it almost impossible to get back to that terrific thought you had in the first place. You get the idea. And don’t forget to notice the emotional range you just experienced as well. Each thought you just had held a different level and type of emotional pull. It’s exhausting! However, being awake brings you to being able to focus without distraction because you are in the moment doing the task and nothing else. Not a bad exchange! And when you start to feel that emotional pull, try physically taking one step back away from it, leaving the emotional feeling over there where you just were. You might have to do that a few times, but by becoming disassociated from the emotion, you have the ability to remain curious and flexible within the situation looking only at the information and facts. It does work so try it. And they say practice makes perfect. So it stands to reason that the more you are able to apply these tools, the easier it will become.
I hope the goal for you now is to make the time to think about how this might work in your life, both within your personal and your career relationships and even when you talk to yourself, you know that inner conversation we have in our heads. It’s for sure going to be a challenge. It’s for sure going to be different. So is it worth your time and energy?
Not Enough Time or Energy to Further Your Business?
